Family Pictures

It's a good thing that we don't take family pictures every day, or else I wouldn't make it to heaven. I confess that taking family pictures brings out the worst in me. I'm a perfectionist and am also impatient. I just want to hurry and get the pictures taken and be done with it, but also want the pictures to be perfect. Good luck doing that with four kids between 19 mos. and 7 yrs. old, especially on a cold, rainy day.

Amazingly, however, we were able to manage to get a few really good pictures of the family and kids, including my favorite family photo below:


We were smart and took the family pictures first before the kids got tired and ornery. But it turned out that the picture of our tired and ornery kids was good too, since it more closely represents real life, unlike the perfect family picture with everyone looking just right and smiling.

The timing of the family photos was good. We took them at my lowest weight in probably the last five years. I had lost twenty pounds this year for my 20-year high school reunion. I put on about 8 lbs. since then, but then I lost it again right in time for the family pictures. Steph has also been losing weight too. She's was at her lowest weight since having Jaron 19 months ago.

So we were both happy with our couple pictures, including the picture below, which is our favorite couple picture of ours...ever:

We both loved this picture, where usually one of us likes a picture, but the other hates the way they look in it. So it ended up that spending 75 frustrating minutes in a cold, drizzle was worth it after all.

One on Ones

About a year ago I decided to start holding regular, scheduled one on ones with my kids. I have always made it a priority to spend time with my kids, particularly because I did not get to spend one-on-one time with my father growing up and did not have a good relationship with him until after my mission.

When I became an adult and a father I came to understand and empathize with my father and the demands on his time trying to raise a family of ten children while running the family business, serving in church callings, and serving friends, neighbors and strangers. But I still felt like I missed out a lot in my childhood by not having a good, close relationship with my father.

My best friend growing up, Case Thornton, was really close to his dad. Case's dad was very easy going and likable. He taught Case how to play baseball and would play catch with him regularly. Case's dad would play catch with me too when I went over to his house. He coached the little league baseball team Case and I played on for one season. We had so much fun that year.

I was really envious of Case's relationship with his father and wished I had a relationship with my father like he did - doing things together like playing catch. I guess that's why whenever I watch the movie Field of Dreams I can't help but cry when it gets to the part at the end when Kevin Costner's character plays catch with his dad.

Ok. I'm getting more personal than I intended when starting this post. But my point is that I committed long ago before getting married and having kids that when I have kids I want to have a close, strong relationship with them like Case and his father had. I did not want my kids to feel towards me the way I did towards my father.

So I have made it a point to regularly talk with and spend time with my kids individually. I snuggle with each of them at bedtime each night, usually with a hand puppet or some kind of make-believe character. I also coach Brandon and Kenyon's baseball team.

But a year ago I decided that I needed to do more and actually set aside time and scheduled regular one-on-ones with my kids, especially since as a father I don't get to spend as much time with them as they do with Stephanie who stays at home to raise them.

In the October 2007 General Conference, Elder Dallin H. Oaks gave a powerful talk titled "Good, Better, Best" where he talked about prioritizing our time. The following part of his talk really resonated with me:

"In choosing how we spend time as a family, we should be careful not to exhaust our available time on things that are merely good and leave little time for that which is better or best. A friend took his young family on a series of summer vacation trips, including visits to memorable historic sites. At the end of the summer he asked his teenage son which of these good summer activities he enjoyed most. The father learned from the reply, and so did those he told of it. “The thing I liked best this summer,” the boy replied, “was the night you and I laid on the lawn and looked at the stars and talked.” Super family activities may be good for children, but they are not always better than one-on-one time with a loving parent.

The amount of children-and-parent time absorbed in the good activities of private lessons, team sports, and other school and club activities also needs to be carefully regulated. Otherwise, children will be overscheduled, and parents will be frazzled and frustrated. Parents should act to preserve time for family prayer, family scripture study, family home evening, and the other precious togetherness and individual one-on-one time that binds a family together and fixes children’s values on things of eternal worth. Parents should teach gospel priorities through what they do with their children."

I could related with that boy about the thing he liked best about their summer trip was just spending the one-on-one time with his dad, since I had always longed for that. I could also relate to the part about the parents feeling frazzled and frustrated with the kids because of being to overscheduled and busy.

So it was after this talk that I decided to schedule one-on-one time with my kids each month. It works out really nicely since there are four weeks in a month and each of my kids were born in a different week of the month. Since Shaylee was born in the first week of the month, I schedule her one-on-one in the first week of the month. Likewise, I schedule Brandon in the second week, Kenyon in the third week, and Jaron in the fourth week.

I usually take them out with me when I go out on errands and let them choose a treat to get like an ice cream cone, a Slurpee, candy, etc. Sometimes we also go and do an activity of their choice like shooting hoops or playing at a playground.

I told them in the Spring that during the summer, we would do a special one-on-one where they could choose to do an extended activity like going ice skating, swimming, miniature golfing, to a movie, etc. The kids were estatic to say the least.

Well because Stephanie and the kids went to Utah for a month in the Summer, and I was working a lot of overtime due to a project at work, I didn't get around to the special one-on-ones until September. But the first three weeks of September still count as Summer officially, so I was able to keep my promise. :)

Brandon originally wanted to go ice skating, and Kenyon wanted to go swimming or miniature golfing. But I thought of an activity that they did not know of, but would love...Laser Tag! When I told them about it, they both wanted to do it and couldn't wait to go. I decided to combine their one-on-ones into a one-on-two, since I thought Laser Tag would be much more fun with three than two, and it was!

I took the boys to the Golden Skate in Vancouver, which is roller skating rink built in the 1970s. It has an enclosed section of the building that is solely set up for Laser Tag. We actually went on the last Saturday of August, but discovered it was closed during August and would reopen the first weekend in September.

The boys were distraught and did not want to wait a week. I told them that we would go and get a Slurpee and go back home and play the Wii together. So we did and had a lot of fun. I played each of the boys in Wii Sports including Baseball, Bowling, and Tennis.

The following Saturday we went back to the Golden Skate and played a couple of games of laser tag. The games only last 7.5 minutes each, but since they're running around with a heavy vest on, they were tired at the end. But they totally loved it and can't wait to go back and do it again. Unfortunately, I forgot to take pictures of this fun activity. :(

Shaylee wanted to go swimming for her one-on-one. Since I had built up a lot of comp time at work over the summer, I took the third Friday of September off from work and took Shaylee and Jaron to go swimming at the Firstenberg Community Center. Unfortunately, the public swimming was not available when we showed up. So we went to Dairy Queen and had a Blizzard.

When I thought about it, I knew that I would not be able to take Shaylee or Jaron down the waterslide if I took both of them. We would just have to hang out and play in the wading area. So I decided to take just Shaylee swimming the next morning.

It was a good thing that I decided to take just Shaylee because she loved the waterslide so much that we spent probably 80 percent of our time there on it. And this time I remembered to take a picture!




















Stephanie told the boys, who had taken swimming lessons in the summer, that we would go swimming together as a family. So we went the following weekend, and I went down the waterslide with Jaron many times, and he loved it too. Stephanie posted an entry on her blog about the family outing.

I am so grateful to the Lord for the beautiful family he has blessed me with. I love my wife and kids more than anything, including Cleveland! :)

I am grateful for the counsel that his servants have given us to strengthen our families. I have been so blessed this past year as I have gone on regular one-on-ones with my children. The bonds of love between me and each of my children have grown even stronger. Truly as President Harold B. Lee taught, the most important work we will ever do will be within the walls of our own homes.

The Tribe is back in town!

Since I am the Cleveland Phenatic, I thought I should start off my blog with my 2nd annual trip to see the Indians play in Seattle even though it was back in July.

This is actually the third time I have seen the Tribe play at Safeco Field. The first time was back in 2002, the year after we moved to the Northwest. It was also the last year my favorite Indian, Jim Thome, played for Cleveland.

Last year, I went up with my friend Blake Perkins (left), who went to dental school in Cleveland and is a Tribe fan, along with Tom Foeller (middle) and John O'Donnell (right).

Tom and John both work at BPA with me, although Tom retired from BPA last year after recovering from cancer. John is a big Mariners fan and came dressed for the occassion as did I.

Last year we caught a double-header in the last week of the season where the first game was a makeup game from a snowed-out game in Cleveland during the first week of April. So Cleveland was actually the home team and batted last in the first game on the road. You don't see that happen very often. Cleveland clubbed the M's 12 to 4 in the first game.

In the second game of the double header, Cleveland led a close game 2 to 1 in the 9th inning, but gave up a game-tying home run with 2 outs. Then still tied at 2 in the bottom of the 10th with 2 outs and runners on 1st and 3rd, the Mariners' hitter hit a sharp grounder to Cleveland's shortstop who booted the ball and let the game-winning run score.

You may be wondering why I am going into detail about the games we went to last season. Well, Cleveland ended up tying the Boston Red Sox with the best record in baseball at 96-66. The Indians ended up playing the Red Sox in the American League Championship Series (ALCS) to go to the World Series.

Since Boston and Cleveland had the same record, Boston had home field advantage in the series because they won the season series against Cleveland. It was a best of 7 game series and Cleveland won 3 of the first 4 games only to lose the last 3 games in a row.

Although Cleveland lost the series, they took Boston to game 7 where the Red Sox swept both the Angels in the ALDS and the Rockies in the World Series. So Cleveland was the only team to beat Boston in the playoffs.

Yet if Cleveland would have held on to win that second game of the double header, which they should have, they would have had the lone best record in baseball and thus the home field advantage against the Red Sox. I'm convinced that if they did, they would have beat Boston and won the World Series.

Instead the Indians' curse of not winning the World Series has been extended to 60 years, second only to the Cubs who are in a good position to end their curse this season. I know that you're thinking that I'm being a bit obsessive about the Tribe, but this is why I'm the Cleveland Phanatic.

One good thing that came out of last year's double header, other than to get to see two games for the price of one, was that we had such a good time that we decided to make it an annual event.

So we took the three-hour drive up to Seattle on Friday, July 18th, which was the Tribe's first game after the All-Star break.

Cleveland who was picked by many analysts to win the A.L. Central and get to the World Series this season, imploded in the first half of the season due to a horrible start by their star pitchers, dismal team hitting, and injuries to several key players. So unlike last season, there wasn't anything on the line in this game, especially since Seattle had the worst record in baseball.

The stadium was packed, though it was mostly due to it being Felix Hernandez bobblehead night. Felix is the Mariners' best pitcher and was pitching that evening. We got to the stadium a couple hours early to catch batting practice and to snag a bobblehead.

It was a scoreless game with 2 outs in the bottom of the 2nd inning when Cleveland's shortstop, who lost game 2 of the double header last year, made an error that led to five unearned runs that inning. The Indians ended up losing 8 to 2.

Regardless, we still had a great time. The weather was great, and our row was picked between innings to win a DVD of the Disney movie College Road Trip starring Martin Lawrence and Donny Osmond. So even though the Tribe lost the game, I got a bobblehead and a DVD out of it. Not bad.

I can't wait until next season. I just found out that Cleveland will play in Seattle on the last weekend of July in 2009. I plan to take my family to a game. I plan to make it an annual event, so my kids will also become Cleveland Phenatics. :)